speaking life instead of death…

Ever since reading Sarah from Emerging Mummy‘s post a few weeks ago In Which She Speaks Life into herself and her tinies, I have been struck with a real urgency in how my words speak truth into our lives.

I have realized that when I talk to someone about Bjørn and tell them how “difficult” he is… I am tearing him down. I am telling him that I am disappointed in his personality and who he is. I am letting myself believe that he is difficult… and I am killing his spirit.

But if I have that same conversation, instead saying how “passionate” he is (different word, same point made!)… I am building him up! I am telling him that I am proud of who he is, and that he can use his personality traits for good in his life!

What I am really doing is taking a sometimes frustrating personality trait in a toddler and focusing on what that trait will be when he grows up!

Yes, my two-year-old is passionate… very full of life… difficult sometimes… but the things that make him difficult now just may be the things that make him extra special later!

He is stubborn. And that stubbornness drives me nuts most days, but I pray that his stubbornness keeps him on the ‘straight and narrow’ path as he gets older… keeping him from being swayed so easily by his peers and the temptations of this life… Helping him be a leader, instead of a follower!

He is emotional. Whether he is sad, happy, or angry… whatever the emotion, he does it loud! He is passionate, and I pray that his passion leads him to love loud… showing those in his life that he cares and doing everything he can to make sure they know it to their very cores.

Yes, he may be only 2 years old… but he hears everything I say. And I want him to know that I think highly of him and am proud of the person he is growing up to be! I am not just miserably waiting for him to ‘grow up already’.

I have also realized how my words speak truth into my own spirit as well!

When I tell myself I am a good mom, I believe I am a good mom. When I tell myself I am failing and doing a miserable job of it, I also believe that I am failing and doing a miserable job of it. And I am killing my own spirit.

Which of these mindsets do you think leads to a happier, healthier family?

Today I promise to speak LIFE into the hearts of my children, my family and myself. Tomorrow I will make that same promise. And again each day until I die.

Will I always keep that promise without failure? I’m sure not. But I will ask forgiveness when I do fail, and continue to focus on building up instead of tearing down.

Will you join me in this quest to speak life instead of death into the hearts of those we love?

natural partying! I mean, parenting…

Just because it sounded like fun… & because I am home alone for a week… & because I want to be cool like my friend Gen over at Uniquely Normal Mom… :o)
I decided to join the “natural parenting” blog party hosted by The Peaceful Housewife!
To start things off, there are some get-to-know-you questions. I answered them below…

(and am about to go read everyone else’s… as soon as I get my rambunctious 2 year old who JUST learned how to climb out of his crib :o( to stay in bed for the night!) Tips and advice welcome!!!!! :o)

Ok, here we go:

1. How many children do you have, and how old are they?

I have three boys!!! A 9 year old, a 2 year old, and a 4 month old. :o)
2. Do you have a partner, or are you a single parent?
I have been married to my husband Andrew for 4 years. Our 9 year old is technically ‘his’, but whatever
3. What are your “hot button” parenting issues?
Sleep-training and un-informed circumcision really get me going, for sure! I just wish everyone would hear and really try to understand the truth behind these practices before making such permanent life-altering decisions!
(That said, if you really make an effort to hear both sides before making your decision, I can respect your decision as parents… it’s the ignorance - chosen or innocent - that really gets me!)
4. Have you made any parenting choices that you didn’t think you would make before you were a parent, i.e. cloth diapering a child when you had previously thought it was disgusting?
Ummm… yeah. I was never going to be one of those ‘cloth-diapering’ parents! :o) haha. Now I’m addicted and would rather shop for fluff than just about anything else!
5. Is there one book or person in particular that’s heavily influenced your parenting choices?
I guess I would say Ina May’s books have been very influential in my life… I just love her!!
If I had to pick one specific thing though, it would be the movie The Business of Being Born (I know it’s not a book, but same difference!). That’s what really pushed me over the edge into a home-birthing, natural mama!
6. If you had to describe each of your children using only one word, what word would you use?
Oh this one is tough. I hate labeling my kids, but for the sake of novelty I will try…
Navy (9) = teenager. Bjørn (2) = stubborn. Haakon (4m) = smiley!
7. Is there one parenting decision that you regret more than others and wish you could change?
Every single day I regret having my firstborn circumcised. I was completely ignorant (maybe because I was afraid to be anything otherwise?) and that ignorance is not something I can take back, as much as I wish I could. :o(
8. Is there an area of your parenting you wish you were better at?
Oh I completely wish I had more patience! :o( I was telling a friend the other day… I’m pretty sure I almost never swore before I had a toddler. He sure knows how to push my buttons!! (Needless to say, I’m pretty much terrified for when he’s a teenager!) :o)
9. Now for the fun questions – is there one particular food or type of food that you could eat every day?
mmm… bread for sure! I could live on bread! (with butter and cheese, of course!) :o)
10. Vanilla ice cream or chocolate?
Breyer’s Vanilla Fudge Twirl (best of both worlds!)
11. What’s your guilty pleasure?
fresh bread. I have been known to eat a whole loaf myself!!
(Seriously… a few months ago, my husband was home when I brought groceries in - including a loaf of fresh french bread - and he said “that’s how big those loaves are?! I thought they were way smaller than that!”) :o)
12. If you could be part of any television show, which show would it be?
Glee!! (I just got done watching Season 1 on Netflix!) Wouldn’t that be just so much fun???
or The Pioneer Woman‘s new show on the Food Network… I’m almost tempted to get TV again for that one. I just love her!! :o)